Learn How Kids Embrace, Consume and Socialize Using Technology

Back to School Tips for Parents Regarding Social Media

By Dr. Patti AgatstonAugust 15, 2012

As a new school year approaches it’s a good time for parents to discuss the use of social media with their children.   Parents of tweens and young teens may also be struggling with the issue of whether to allow their kids to have profiles on social media sites.  While parents often ask me what age is appropriate for a child to have a Facebook account, I always respond that (outside of the minimum age requirements of the site) age is less important than their son’s or daughter’s maturity and willingness to follow some agreed-upon guidelines.  I also suggest to parents that if they are not willing to take the time to have some important conversations with their children and to do some monitoring of their use, than the parents are not ready for their children to use social media!

So what are important topics to discuss with your son or daughter regarding the use of social media?   Privacy is one of the most important.  Explain to your children the importance of making use of privacy settings on a social networking site so that everyone does not have access to their personal information.  Facebook in particular now allows you to share posts and photos with smaller groups of individuals so that we can truly separate our friends, family members, and acquaintances.  Walking through the privacy and account settings with your son or daughter can greatly help them understand all of the choices they have regarding sharing.  And it may be a great learning experience for you as a parent as well.

In addition to privacy settings, parents should discuss with their children what is appropriate to share.  Many parents are worried that kids will share information that will place them at risk for contact by an internet predator.  However the research shows that just sharing personal information does not increase their risk.  They are more likely to get into trouble if they meet multiple people online, engage in sexually oriented chats/photo sharing, and then agree to meet these individuals offline.  So setting guidelines about appropriate sites to visit, and what constitutes an appropriate friend request and conversation can help prevent such a rare but frightening event.

Talking with children about how they treat their peers online and offline is a critical conversation.  Your children have likely heard a great deal about bullying in the media.  Talk about the importance of treating others with respect and not joining in if they witness cruel behavior in the classroom or on social media.  Discuss actions they can take as a witness to bullying behavior (support a peer, report to an adult, intervene if appropriate) and let them know that you will help them if they are ever targeted by bullying or cyberbullying.

Parents spend a great deal of time worrying about stranger danger, but research demonstrates that youth are far more likely to experience victimization at the hands of their peers.  And youth who embarrass and harass others online increase their own risk of victimization!  So take time to teach your children to treat others with respect, both online and offline.  It’s protective – and it’s the right thing to do!

AUTHOR OVERVIEW

Patti Agatston, Ph.D.

Dr. Agatston is co-author of the book, Cyber Bullying: Bullying in the Digital Age, with Robin Kowalski, Ph.D., and Susan Limber, Ph.D. and has co-authored a chapter for the book, Expert Perspectives in Cyberbullying. She is also co-author of the Cyber Bullying Prevention Curriculum for Grades 6 – 12 and the Cyber Bullying Prevention Curriculum for Grades 3 – 5. Dr. Agatston is a Licensed Professional Counselor and serves on the Board of Directors for the International Bullying Prevention Association. She has appeared on CNN as well as other local and national radio and television programs to discuss cyber bullying and other youth online risky behavior. She was a participant in the CDC’s Expert Panel on Electronic Media and Youth Violence, and has presented nationally and internationally on cyber bullying.

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2 Responses

  1. The topic starter give us some decent points there~~~ before I have no idea about it but now I seemed know somthing~~~lol~`thanx the starter ~~keeping your blog fresh..I will get your back~~~

  2. Good Afternoon! We have a new 3D Animated cartoon series coming out soon called The Tell-A-Tell Family, and the first episode is called “Saved from the Bully” and with this first production of the series for bullying we have created a “Say NO 2 Bullying” Campaign. We seek to educate children with this series on topics such as lying, stealing, you are important, and of course bullying. Here is a bit more information regarding it…

    The Tell-A-Tell Family “Saved From the Bully”
    In this Coming Soon feature Film “Saved from the Bully” it seeks to address and educate on all areas of Bullying from physically bullying, verbal bullying, and cyber bullying. Bullying is not FAIR, for anyone, no one should be Bullied because of race, ethnicity, sex, or religion. “Saved from the Bully” teaches children not to be bystanders, but what they can do to help, if they see someone being bullied, and it also gives knowledge about what children can do if they too are victims of being Bullied. We may not be able to eliminate Bullying with just this one facet, but let’s TRY to get the awareness of Bullying out in society and in the minds of others, even more. SUPPORT the “Say NO 2 Bullying” Campaign.

    So we were wondering would you be interested in helping us push this campaign. Such as posting it on your blog or website, or sharing our goal with others. We are also trying to raise funds to finish the production to find out more info about this visit:

    http://www.indiegogo.com/tatfamily?c=home&a=1257350

    Thank You

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